Archive for the ‘weight weight just love me’ Category

Weight Weight Just Love Me – Graduation – Thanksgiving Day

Thursday, November 26th, 2015

Michelle LaBrosse, CCPM, PMP, PMI-ACP, RYT

All set for foodie game day - let the cooking begin.

All set for foodie game day – let the cooking begin.

I did not plan to complete the 66 day challenge the day before Thanksgiving.  My dietician says this is my graduation day so I feel compelled to write one more post.  I’m quite thankful I did this challenge.  My norm before this was to find fault with myself as the first go to when something happened – like the other night I slipped on the ice outside of the high school.  I rolled around a bit like a beached sea lion.  But it was exactly this rolling around like a beached sea lion why I did not get injured.  After landing on my knee, bouncing on my bum and rolling onto my shoulder, amazingly not a one thing hurts on me.  My new norm, is to find how amazing things are. Now I realize, I’m in great great great shape. Being round, I roll and roll well.  Having some padding with the great shape I’m in has me in the perfect shape for how I move through the world.

I bounced out of bed early to get my turkey going this AM – we are doing dinner at my daughter’s place – the dietician.  She says to load up on the veggies but all this other stuff, well it’s not all that special and we can have it any time.  I have to agree with her. This is kind of a foodie amateur day. It’s how people who enjoy the partying scene say New Year’s Eve is for amateurs.   This one is very easy – toss in a turkey, peel some potatoes, chunk up some good bread and toss in a couple onions, celery, some spices for the dressing.  Get some whole cranberries and with a little sugar make a lovely homemade cranberry sauce.   Enroll everyone else in making everything else – voila – Thanksgiving dinner.  The other night I made a halibut lasagna with homemade chia seed noodles from fresh milled durham weeds.  And I also made a sprouted rye loaf of bread with walnuts.  That meal, with it’s ten layered lasagna and homemade bread, that was a lot of work.  Today, I have a couple other projects going and hoo hummm – not much to it.

I’m so thankful for this wonderful life and all the great people who share in its moments with me.  Graduation day maybe needs to become gratitudation day.


Weight Weight Just Love Me – Attributes – Day 66

Wednesday, November 25th, 2015

Michelle LaBrosse, CCPM, PMP, PMI-ACP, RYT

I'd like to add something on the left side - successful people love themselves more.

I’d like to add something on the left side – successful people love themselves more.

I made it to the last day of creating a habit to love myself more.  The largest challenge of this 66 day effort was finding something to write about on this topic of loving myself more every day.  When I started this, I thought I already did a pretty good job of loving myself.  What I learned along the way though was I needed to love myself more.  This required me to recognize what I thought of what other people thought of me were just in fact, my thoughts about myself.  How can we ever know what someone is really thinking or feeling – even if/when they tell us?  And how do we know the journey they took to feel that way – it’s truly not my issue how someone feels about me – even if they tell me they don’t like this or that about me – so what.  Its very easy to find scientifically valid research to show pretty much anything we want to show – such as being fatter is better than being thinner, eating butter is better than eating margarine,  enjoying sweets from time to time is actually good for you, etc etc etc.  Plus,  the attributes for me that create my awesome life are most certainly not the same attributes that will create an awesome life for someone else.

What I do know after doing this challenge is creating the habit to love myself more helps me love other people more.  I’m much more patient with others – allowing them to be whomever is right for them in the moment – regardless of how they may feel about me.  We are all on our own journey here and the world truly does need more love not less.  Starting on myself was a good way to increase the love everywhere else in my life.

The next challenge I’m doing is with my whole team at Cheetah Learning – it’s about becoming happier in life.   We are starting on Sunday November 29th (and finishing on my birthday Feb. 2nd).   We are each doing the Happiness Yoga Flow every day and focusing on the word of the day and how it relates to increasing happiness in our lives.  We’ll all be blogging about it together – a paragraph a day about what we are learning.


Kate’s comment: I am so excited to follow The Happiness Project blog posts. The Weight Weight Just Love Me blog series has been really uplifting. It’s fun to read from the beginning to the end and watch the progress and self-assuredness increase.

Weight Weight Just Love Me – Periphery – Day 65

Tuesday, November 24th, 2015

Michelle LaBrosse, CCPM, PMP, PMI-ACP, RYT

Determining the inner circle is a rather complicated math equation. My inner circle was far easier to determine.

Determining the inner circle is a rather complicated math equation. My inner circle was far easier to determine.

I’ve asked several folks in my inner circle if they notice a difference between when I started this 66 day challenge and now.  The consensus is I seem less defensive overall,  more patient and accepting in general.  Plus it seems I am more of an advocate for who I am.  So there you have it – undertaking an effort to create a habit to love myself more, did in fact benefit those closest to me in some tangible ways.

I now don’t have the knee jerk reaction of “here we go again with the lectures” about going to see my dietitian – it’s just an academic exchange about what I can do to be more mindful of how my dietary practices could be impacting me and what I could do about it if I wanted to experiment.  I don’t feel like I take as many things as personally as I did before.  So I interact with people more in the moment based on what the actual exchange is rather than throwing it through a filter that they may be judging me one way or another.

I read something a while ago that the cure for feeling jealous was to learn how to love yourself more. I now know the cure to feeling body shaming too is to learn how to love yourself more.  Maybe learning how to love yourself more could be the cure for lots of other things too – like you feel persecuted for how a sect of people treated your relatives centuries ago – love yourself more.  You’re still angry about how you were treated in grade school by some bully,  practice loving yourself more and it ceases to be an issue.   You don’t like how someone raced past you on the highway – love yourself more – whatever was going on for them is there issue.

It’s now my new chicken soup – anytime I’m feeling less then, or upset, or angry, or jealous, or jarred, or scared, or defensive, or frustrated, or melancholy, or nostalgic, or longing, or anxious, or impatient, or judgmental, – love myself more.  Ahhh – all is once again right with the world.  It is the love that radiates throughout me that creates my reality – and I am the one who controls the thermostat on that.


Kate’s comment: What an awesome transformation! It is also a good example of how transitions don’t happen immediately – they are a process and an investment that take time. You’ve demonstrated how useful that investment is and I hope others see the benefit in following suit!

Weight Weight Just Love Me – Advice – Day 64

Monday, November 23rd, 2015

Michelle LaBrosse, CCPM, PMP, PMI-ACP, RYT

Sometimes the advice other people give just doesn't measure up today.

Sometimes the advice other people give just doesn’t measure up today.

Here is a great study about how food impacts each of us differently. This is from  recent research reported on in Science Daily:

“After seeing this data, I think about the possibility that maybe we’re really conceptually wrong in our thinking about the obesity and diabetes epidemic,” says Segal. “The intuition of people is that we know how to treat these conditions, and it’s just that people are not listening and are eating out of control–but maybe people are actually compliant but in many cases we were giving them wrong advice.”

This reminds me of how many women died in child birth because doctors did not know the importance of washing their hands.  At that time, their premise was that women were evil and had “evil” spirits that took their lives. When something happens with the patient the doctor did not intend, then of course there is something wrong with the patient, not the doctor.  How we have not evolved much past this is beyond me.

I’m almost at the end of this 66 day challenge – what is so telling is how some folks are still very much plagued with these standard ways of thinking.   One of my friends reported hearing from a mutual acquaintance who said – “I see Michelle is losing weight (after reading my blog).”  Seriously?   I have actually arrived at the place where I love myself just the way I am – however I am.  At this weight or any other weight.  My primary pursuit is how to love myself more so I can be even happier in life (the world really does need more happy people).  One useful piece of advice I got was to language that I have in fact lost weight –  meaning I lost the weight of the world on the issue of weight.  However anyone feels about me regarding what I weigh and how they feel I look is about them and their preferences – it’s not about me.  My very robust ex-husband used to say the people who have a weight problem are the one’s who do not accept themselves.  And that is a heavy weight to bear – very much in need of a weight loss effort.


Kate’s commentIf anyone is interested more about the hand-washing, childbirth, midwives, and the transition to male gynecologists, there is a great, short, non-fiction book called, “The Doctor’s Plague“. It chronicles Ignaz Semmelweis and his (poorly communicated) crusade to get OBGYNs washing their hands and saving their patients. A great book on medical history and an even better example of “it’s not what you say, it’s how you say it”.

Weight Weight Just Love Me – Processing – Day 63

Sunday, November 22nd, 2015

Michelle LaBrosse, CCPM, PMP, PMI-ACP, RYT

Canning tuna to get ready for the long Alaskan winter. Makes me appreciate my ample fat stores even more.

Canning tuna to get ready for the long Alaskan winter. Makes me appreciate my ample fat stores even more.

I know for the therapist types “processing” means something related to life with your mother.  But for me it means processing food.  And that is what I’m up to today. I scored two 25 pound whole tuna’s right before I left Alaska in September.   Since I was leaving, and they were already frozen, I tossed them in my freezer to process when I came back up here.  I’m also soaking rye berries and almonds.  I’m going to be making almond milk and sprouted grain breads too.  I was a little surprised that my post on being a “zealot” was the most read blog post of this series – maybe I’m striking a chord with all this “processing?”

I’m super excited to be making our own canned tuna. I made a lemon zest salt mixture and we’re packing them in pint jars.  I’m wondering just what does all of this have to do with loving myself more?   My dietitian introduced me to a fascinating idea several years ago I never thought much about – food insecurity. I guess this is a psychological issue in Alaska – enough so she got funded to study it on college students while at UAA.  So maybe my food processing could also be related to the therapist style of processing related to my mother.  My mother had this pantry closet filled to the gils with canned food – most of what my dietitian would call “safety” food – the type of food you would only eat if you were truly starving.   The benefit of storing safety food like this is you will in fact not consume it when you are not starving so you do have store of supplies if this ever did become the present day reality.   I’ve said for years, I enjoy my extra rolls of fat as I know I could survive an impending famine.  This would give me sufficient time to figure out how to secure food.   So, yeah I’m a lot better off just the way I am.

I’m hoping my canned tuna though comes out better than the canned safety food my mother had stored in her pantry.   If not, y’all know what you will be getting for Christmas.


Kate’s comment: I would be so happy to get some of your canned tuna for Christmas – it’s delicious! It wouldn’t serve as my safety food, either. It wouldn’t last long enough in my cupboard to only eat when I ran out of other food (that’s what that old Rice-a-Roni is for, not your amazing canned tuna).

Weight Weight Just Love Me – Support – Day 62

Saturday, November 21st, 2015

Michelle LaBrosse, CCPM, PMP, PMI-ACP, RYT

Beautiful drive into town this AM to share the morning with a number of folks who are very supportive of my efforts to love myself more - thank you all for your kind words.

Beautiful drive into town this AM to share the morning with a number of folks who are very supportive of my efforts to love myself more – thank you all for your kind words.

It’s been so much fun being here in Alaska back with my daughter Kate, but also with the larger community.  I went into town today to visit the Christmas fair.  I ran into a number of people who follow this blog and many were so kind and supportive of my efforts to love myself more.  Oddly enough, even though I have not stepped on a scale in over two months, and have made no significant efforts to diet,  several people commented I do look “better.”  I feel better about myself overall with doing this challenge so it makes sense that would translate into looking better.  And I’m wearing a size smaller pants (they are a little tight – but they do fit).

One of my good friends was at the fair with these beautiful home made bagels.   I said to her – “I really can’t eat commercial wheat.”  She asked to me to write a blog post about the “fear and loathing of bagels.”  My sweetheart did get one of her bagels and shared a quarter with me – it was delicious.  I have an affinity for incredible bagels anyhow, so it was nice I got to indulge in part of one. But I will expand here on just why I have fear and loathing of bagels.  It is not so much the bagels themselves I fear and loathe,  but the commercial wheat used to make them.  Conventionally raised wheat is harvested before the wheat has a chance to germinate.  And then it’s milled and much of the fibrous, and most nutritious parts are stripped out of it so that bakers can create more consistent products with longer shelf lives.  Sometimes, I get a stomachache when I consume baked products made from conventionally raised wheat.  PLUS, refined flours are high glycemic which means my body experiences a rapid rise in blood sugar and this is not good for my heart, my liver, my pancreas, my eyes, my kidneys, my joints, or my brain.   I do love bagels, but I make mine from organic wheat berries I sprout, rinse, dry, then mill.  This removes all the toxins, while releasing enzymes that make it easier to digest.  Plus sprouting the grains makes a flour that has a lower glycemic index so I do not get a blood sugar spike.  I love myself enough to go to this level of effort – I am worth it and I can do it.


Kate’s comment: one of the other great bonuses about making bagels yourself is that it’s easier to control the size of the bagel. Bagels have supersized – and for no good reason. They can still be satisfying snacks at half the size.

Weight Weight Just Love Me – Tenure – Day 61

Friday, November 20th, 2015
Winter beauty tenures my heart to the ever present love all around.

Winter beauty tenures my heart to the ever present love all around.

Michelle LaBrosse, CCPM, PMP, PMI-ACP, RYT

I feel as if I’ve attained tenure in some respects through this challenge to learn how to  love myself more.  By tenure I mean that my position is secure – who I am and how I move through the world as love and joy in action an irrefutable part of who I am.   I’m allowing myself to love all (including me) without conditions as the main person who benefits from this position is ME.   It matters not one iota how someone else feels about me – it is the love that is in my heart expressed out to the world however that happens to be in the moment that matters.  While most “tenured” positions are granted by other faculty and the institutions they serve, this one was granted by allowing my own inner divinity to take center stage in my life.

The other day I was watching the movie “Yogaanada” about how yoga was brought to the west in the 1920’s.   And the role of waking up the god inside through the spine by doing yoga.  The movie talked about being self realized and being god realized. Being “god realized” from my understanding is with recognizing how we are all one – part of the infinite love of the universe.  Part of my feeling of having “tenure” may be an awakening to the infinite love of the universe being ever present inside of me.

Yes it does help too that I’m in Alaska in early winter.  The cocoon of increasing darkness blanketed in snow activates my bliss and opens my heart.  It is the stark contrasts of winter in Alaska that enable me find the deep pleasure of cozy warmth while enjoying  the briskness of fresh fallen snow on a cold, blustery winter day.   An added bonus is my yoga practice makes me more capable of navigating the dangers of the slick ice and snow.  It’s just like the love myself more practice helps me navigate the challenge of others’ differing realities.


Kate’s comment: I love the early winter because it helps my cozy home feel even cozier. I love sitting by the window with a cup of hot tea and knitting – but I feel guilty about doing this when it’s warm out. This time of year is the best.

Weight Weight Just Love Me – Journey – Day 60

Thursday, November 19th, 2015
Snap shots in the moment capture something different then what is readily noticeable - it's why loving myself more happens in an instant when I stop to notice.

Snap shots in the moment capture something different then what is readily noticeable – it’s why loving myself more happens in an instant when I stop to notice.

Michelle LaBrosse, CCPM, PMP, PMI-ACP, RYT

I’m writing this from the airport at the start of my journey to Alaska.  I have made my way north every November now for almost the past five years.  I figure if the eagles are going north, so must I.  (There is a large gathering of bald eagles in Haines, Alaska every November to catch the last salmon run of the season).  When most folks are planning vacations to somewhere warm, I prefer to head to where it’s most assuredly winter. I did, after all spend forty years looking at the duck I made in 7th grade that flew in the other direction of all the ducks my other siblings had also made in 7th grade shop class.   So it just makes sense I would go in this direction with my own flock.

I read an article yesterday that appears finding health and happiness in my round cherub state is now gaining popularity amongst the research elite.  While the haters who hate anything other than lean continue to refute the mounting research,  there is more and more evidence that people with a bit of heft are actually the most healthy around.   But it’s this journey to learn how to love myself more where I realize, it matters not one iota if scientists like my rolls or not.  What matters is how do I love them?  So if it took a little bit of pudge for me to learn to love myself more,  well even more reasons to love my rolls.  What emerged from this adventure has uplifted me far more than any diet I’ve ever attempted.


Kate’s comment: you’ve found some really great doctors who look beyond initial impressions and who look at health markers in other ways. I’m really grateful for that – because the history of medicine shows us that some medical blanket statements show how bad of ideas they are 20-30 years later. In the mid 20th century, it was widely advised to prevent weight gain during pregnancy, and to avoid breastfeeding and opt for forumla. The result? A generation with wonky metabolism.

Weight Weight Just Love Me – Gifts – Day 59

Wednesday, November 18th, 2015

Michelle LaBrosse, CCPM, PMP, PMI-ACP, RYT

For some reason my creativity peaks around the time when my virtual office becomes a plane.

For some reason my creativity peaks around the time when my virtual office becomes a plane.

I’m here tying up lots of loose ends getting ready to head north for Thanksgiving.  On days like this there is no need to cajole myself into performing as I effortlessly stay focused to make sure I finish all I need to do.  And this is why I love these trips.  It seems I get more done on the day before a trip than I do the whole month before.  The irony is where I’m headed is my creative sanctuary so there is no need for me to put the after burner on any writing projects, yet it is this heat that stimulates my writing like nothing else.  I wake up on these days full of vim and vigor to tackle the task at hand.   Too much time is never a good thing for me.  Give me a pressing due date and I deliver like there is no tomorrow.

I have no need to stop to wonder why this is so.  I accept it as a gift and respond with the graciousness of the gift that it is.  It may also be why to be the prolific producer I am,  I be bop around the planet like most folks take a jaunt across town.  Even the thought of sitting in a plane seat opens up my creative fervor and away I go finishing my latest writing project.  Today is no different.

As I’m getting close to the end of this 66 day challenge, I realize it will end where it began – up in Alaska, enjoying time with my dietitian – who helped spawn this idea in the first place.  I’ve learned much in this challenge to love myself more.  Like today instead of saying – why can’t I be this focused on other days?  I recognize this is what it is and it’s wonderful just the way it is as I ride the rising tide of uplifting productivity however that is happening in the moment.


Kate’s comment: cravings come from your body’s need for a certain nutrient – and being able to filter real cravings from habit-based cravings can result in balanced nourishment. I think this might be what you’re experiencing with difference in day’s productivity – you knew what you needed to get done, and you did it. Go with the flow – obviously, your work flow has served you well in the past. Look at where you are today.

Weight Weight Just Love Me – Laughter – Day 58

Tuesday, November 17th, 2015

Michelle LaBrosse, CCPM, PMP, PMI-ACP, RYT

Find the humor everywhere is a big part of who I am.

Finding the humor everywhere is a big part of who I am.

Several months ago I had the good fortune to participate in a laughter yoga program run by my friend Jackie Ruggirello. Now I love to laugh as much as the next person.  It’s actually part of my stunning personality – to be jovial.   As my assistant Rita says – “laughter is a major subject you know.  You have an intoxicating laugh.  It’s not even anything is all that funny, but because you’re laughing, I laugh.  I don’t mean any offense by this.”  (none taken).  But here I’m sitting down to write this blog post, just wondering how I can make this funny – LOL.

I did find a home for my laughter during the laughter yoga program – it was with humor.   Sitting around and just laughing, well that was fun, but it is even more fun to have a reason to laugh.  Now granted I do laugh at some things that wouldn’t be all that funny – like that IRS audit.  But even then, we found the comedy with that.  Like we had to do photo shoot that showed me working with the cattle as the IRS was saying since I did not actively manage the cattle ranch, I could not deduct it – this was actually NOT true.  But that is not the point of this – even with the IRS audit, we were able to find the laughter.  My assistant printed off an 8×10 color glossy photo of the picture on this blog for the attorney to use with the IRS to prove I was actively involved in the operations of my cattle ranch.  It even became the front page of our business plan.

Laughter truly is great medicine and it’s found it’s way into my medicine chest to cope with some intensely challenging times.   Like when I was caring for the person who’s laughter I inherited – my mother.   That phase was the best of times and the worst of times.  Our norm together was laughter and this was no different.  There was much comedy in the  crazy situations we found ourselves in together while dealing with her brain cancer.  What brings this to mind was a conversation I had with my oldest daughter last night.  She learned by taking care of my mother with me, your true personality is the last thing to go.  My daughter commented my biggest asset is my personality with my abilities to laugh at just about anything.  With my Mom, even though she became paralyzed and her brain was fairly compromised with the brain cancer, she still found the humor in many parts of this experience.  I figure if she and I could laugh together through that, well I can laugh through just about anything.

I’ve found though that some people don’t quite get this laughter part of me.  And they question my sincerity (even integrity) if I’m laughing and making light of my foibles.  While I want to be compassionate, even empathic, I do question how this is for my best and highest good to be in these situations?   Then I remember my calling – to be love and joy in action and realize, yes I need to find the gallows humor here too.  Seriously how people don’t find a lovable cherub who finds the humor in just about everything the best thing to ever walk into their life is absolutely beyond me.  I need to recall as part of this loving myself more challenge- she who laughs first, laughs longest and lasts longest.


Kate’s comment: What Anne said – about your true personality being the last thing to go – is so true. I think Memere’s personality is still alive and well, because when I think of her, I remember her laughter. That’s the picture and impression that will be my lasting memory of her. Keeping her true personality alive in my thoughts and remembering it daily brings her back each time.