Michelle LaBrosse Blogs

Michelle LaBrosse, CCPM, PMP, PMI-ACP, RYT

Most of what I love could easily fit in this home. Yet I live in places required for the businesses I run. Thankfully I have great talent to help me enjoy this existence.

Yesterday when I woke up I had no idea I would be changing the decor in seven rooms in my Portland hang (essentially the whole house).  My visualist was up for the trade show that was a bust and we were going to make the best of her time here by shooting video’s for an upgrade we are doing on our course “The Happiness Project.” But we got to discussing how we could be using four rooms in this place differently – two were on the third floor and two were on the ground floor.  We needed stuff on the third floor on the ground floor and stuff on the ground floor on the third floor.  Now this I think is what happens to people who use photo shop too much.  Of course we can easily move things here and there, it’s just the click of a mouse…..

Being the true engineer that I am, I wanted to do this project with the least amount of effort (and cost).  So I texted my favorite movers (aptly named “Portland Movers”) to check on their availability (no I do not have them on speed dial).  They sent two guys over within the hour.  Three hours later, we had everything in the places we wanted, and actually reorganized seven rooms (the project expanded).  And these two guys managed to disassemble and reassemble large beds and couches required to move it all.  Plus they also rehung pictures – even moved stuff back up two flights of stairs.  During the process, they also found a dead baby possum in a window well in the back yard.  Since they are movers, they moved that too, right into the garbage.   The total bill for essentially moving the largest items in the house two flights of stairs – both up and down – $150.   I’m sitting here in what is essentially a redecorated place – and everything feels like it’s now exactly where it needs to be.  Well for the time being…..

Loving myself more has always meant to me to hire the right people for the job. So this is not really something new for me to do. I’m a master of efficiency – and I like to get things done fast.  No sense in belaboring the inevitable when I know something needs to happen. When someone asks me to help them move – I ask them – “when and where would you like the moving folks to show up?” (You can well imagine I get very few requests to help people move).  I’m not sure where a requirement of friendship required the hard (and dangerous) physical labor of moving?  If you want to keep your friends or want to be a better friend, when moving, spring for a little help.  Easy enough to find anywhere – Uhaul even has a moving helper app where you find people to assist you for a couple hours.  You can invite your friends over for pizza after the job is done.  They will love you more for this.  I know this, trust me.

Kate’s comment: A dead baby possum?!? Sad and gross! That sounds like a really productive day – did you get yourself enough food through the hustle and bustle?

Michelle LaBrosse, CCPM, PMP, PMI-ACP, RYT

Nostalgia, while nice, doesn’t allow for the magic of the moment. While I do miss the New England fall weather, I’ve never seen this color next to a banana plant in New England.

Yesterday was a great reminder to follow my gut.  I had gotten myself into a situation where I was at an event I never wanted to do in the first place. I wasn’t even supposed to be here this weekend.  I showed up to placate someone else who thought it was a good idea. It was not the right fit, even though I tried to stay open minded in case I was not seeing things clearly.

I was there with three others and we caucused on if we should stay.  We had unanimous agreement to bale.  We then went and had a delightful afternoon.  We even sold a Happy Aging Yoga mat to a complete stranger while getting pedicures.  Ironically we had just left an event we were at specifically to sell our Happy Aging Yoga Mats, but it was an event more for people looking for psychics and crystals.  On the surface to someone who may not really understand what we are about, this looked like it could be a fit (this was how we ended up there).  Yet the Happiness Project (that includes the Happy Aging Yoga Mat)  is more about activating what is within rather than looking outside yourself for answers.  While I can neither refute nor validate the metaphysical, the programs I create are based in the evidence based scientific realms I move in.  I know my home and who my family is. Our students value us because of our research and subsequent applications that do in fact generate the intended results. There is a place for the mystical and allowing for the mysteries of life – yet I have found a proven formula that works to expand one’s happiness, and it is based on verified practices from cultures around the world.  This metaphysical fair was not the event for us.

Even with calling myself out as a scientist,  I am willing to recognize serendipitous events do happen from time to time.  What happened after pedicures  though was true magic.  I ran into old friends who used to live in one of my homes in Connecticut.  But yesterday, we were in the Pacific Northwest – and it was a very cold, wet miserable day at that.  The type of day that activates my mythological  nostalgia about sunny New England in the fall.  They shared with me their good friend was moving into that  same home we had both lived in.  Their friend was so elated.  We all loved that home and it’s so nice to share in another’s joy we once had.

While this may not seem like such a big deal – it was a big deal for me.  I felt like I was back into the flow of love – loving myself for following my heart and leaving an event that was not the right place for me.

Kate’s comment: A few (very legitimate, very famous) scientists dabbled in the supernatural world after their groundbreaking discoveries… but they didn’t find much verifiable evidence in their studies. I agree with you that one or the other isn’t right, but exploring that area is interesting and very intelligent people before us have attempted to legitimize it.

Healthy Living Magazine is profiling the way I  use accelerated learning principles to teach yoga.

Michelle LaBrosse, CCPM, PMP, PMI-ACP, RYT

What a big yee haaaaaa! started my day yesterday when I saw that Healthy Living Magazine wrote an article on the accelerated learning program I created to help people learn yoga.  And then to see it is the top article on their website – an even bigger woo hoo!!  It’s very easy to love myself more with this type of publicity.  Maybe deep down, I’m just a media hound.  That is positive media.  And well of course – who wants to read negative stuff about themselves?  And seriously, media aside, who wants to hear negative commentary about themselves anyhow?  I have always thought constructive criticism was just a chance for someone to put an intellectual face on being mean.  I can’t think of a single incidence when constructive criticism ever uplifted another.  While I’m fine with directness, especially when I’ve ruffled their feathers or their’s mine,  this deliberate waiting in the weeds to ambush me with constructive criticism where they have practiced their complaint of me – no thank you.  Constructive criticism needs to stay in the dictionary of Corporate BS.

I wonder how thoughts of recognition bring up my issues with constructive criticism?  It’s pretty easy to unravel this one as from a survival perspective, we stay alive longer by remembering the negative events to avoid.   But I have learned time and time again, whatever we pay attention to, give energy to, lives and stays alive.   When I let it go and don’t give other’s angst any energy,  it ceases to exist – at least in my reality.  The converse is true as well.  Reveling in glory days – it’s nice for a while.  But I do know you are only as good as your next home run.  So continual upgrading is required (and fun) as well who wants to get stagnant?  It’s still nice to get this level of recognition every once in a while though.

Kate’s comment: I think that constructive criticism tends to be unproductive because too much emphasis is put on the “criticism” than the “constructive”. I agree that there is no place for constructive criticism in our world today, at least with the current way people use it. My favorite is the “no offense, but…”.

When I focus my filters on the areas I influence and control – my abilities to love myself more improve.

Michelle LaBrosse, CCPM, PMP, PMI-ACP, RYT

Occasionally I get these grand ideas that take me a little bit of time to bring to reality.  One such idea originated in 2010 about creating my own “tarot” cards.  Being of the philosophy though that what we experience in life is from our own hand based on what fate delivers, I wanted these cards to be more of what one could do rather than what happens seemingly beyond our control.  Using the basis of an idea I created in a course we created in 2008 called Project Prosperity, that was an offshoot of my book “Spiritual Money,”  I created a deck of cards we initially called “Opportunity Expansion” cards.   These cards help people figure out how to leverage four non-financial sources of capital to pursue their dreams.  I initially started out using a regular deck of cards where each suit represented one of the four non-financial sources of capital (social, brand, knowledge, and infrastructure).  Each card of the suit had a word associated with it and an idea on how to best leverage that source of capital to achieve your goals.  And recently we just completed our own cards, renaming them “Inspired Eagle” cards.

These cards are done just in time for us to do readings in our booth at Portland’s Body, Mind and Spirit conference this weekend.  So I was practicing with the cards last night.   How much fun!!!  One of the cards I drew was an infrastructure card called “filters.”  Infrastructure Capital is about what do you already have in your life you can draw from to pursue your dreams and goals.  So the filters card is an interesting application of infrastructure capital as our filters are a combination of both conscious and subconscious scripts through which we view the world.  For example, if I see the world through the filter that it is a kind and benevolent place, I will see the kind and benevolent examples that validate this bias.   Here is what this card advises:

“Evaluate the filters through which you view the world. You can and do create new filters based on your life experiences and the choices you make in life. Contemplate how you would prefer your filters to help you perceive the world around you. Practice every day seeing the world you would prefer to see and watch what happens over time with your ability to achieve your dreams and goals.”

This was a great card with which to evaluate just how far I’ve come in this pursuit to create a habit to love myself more.  As every action I now contemplate is run through the filter – what needs to happen here so I am more loving to myself?   Ultimately I can only decide what is in my best and highest good.  I get to choose the filters through which I experience the world.   We each live life through our own filters so how someone else chooses to see me is based on their filters – not mine.

Kate’s comment: could another term for “filters” be “reframing”? I love reframing. I recently reframed ranch salad dressing – by making it healthier using lower fat dairy and using my own herbs and spices rather than a pre-made seasoning pack. It reframed it from being an occasional salad treat to something that would completely elevate the taste and health of my vegetable choices.

Michelle’s Response – Reframing is what you do once you realize a filter you have may not be best serving you.   Realize it often enough to create the correct filter so you don’t have to keep reframing.

Michelle LaBrosse, CCPM, PMP, PMI-ACP, RYT

Loving myself more is taking on more subtle nuances – just like my Bolognese.

I’ve been making spaghetti on Wednesdays for 43 years now.  When I was ten years old I offered to start making dinner for the family as both my parents worked and were tired when they got home. Plus I really enjoyed being in the kitchen.   I remember the recipe back then – toss onions, peppers, mushrooms, a tablespoon each of dried oregano, basil, and parsley, a couple tablespoons of vegetable oil, a pinch of salt and pepper, and a pound of ground beef into a large stock pot.  Easy enough for a ten year old to do.  Then once that is all cooked, add in two large cans of stewed tomatoes, two large cans of tomato sauce and two small cans of tomato paste. Cover and cook on low for an hour or two (go out and play).  Come back in fifteen minutes before dinner.  Put a large pot of water on with a little salt and some oil.  Add in two boxes of regular spaghetti. Make a tossed salad with iceberg lettuce, hot house tomatoes, peeled cucumbers, some celery.  Get out the Italian salad dressing.   It served our family of eight – no leftovers (we rarely had leftovers).

I did not deviate from my mother’s recipe for decades (including the taking off to “play” while the sauce simmered).  Yes I tried out my Italian friend’s recipes for “Sunday sauce” where you make a stock of pork and beef bones – just was never the same as “Mom’s.”   But then I went to cooking school in Parma, Italy and got more into where my food came from. I had already started the shift to only grass fed beef when I raised my own cattle.  When I learned of the toxins now in canned tomato’s (from the canning process), I shifted to only fresh tomatoes. In Italy I learned how much more delicious fresh tomatoes’ roasted in the oven were over anything in a can.  And I also learned the concept of layering and just why a whole head of garlic sweated in some very good cold pressed olive oil was critical to a good Bolognese.  I discovered how grating a lemon peel and adding in the  juice of that lemon into the garlic right after the sweating, kept the essence of the garlic but took out the bite of too much garlic. I learned the value of both dried and fresh herbs and when to use them at different times to increase the complexity of the sauce.  My Mom had it right to add in the dried herbs in the sauté.   Now I put them in right after the lemon and crush them in my hands right before. Letting them roll around in that heating melee for a while while I dice a shallot into small bits. While I’m roasting the tomatoes, I also toss in the peppers.  Let the whole scene cool, and dice up the peppers first – into the growing layers they go.  The grass fed beef goes in after the peppers.  The last veggie to the scene are the cooled peeled roasted tomatoes I squeeze into the sauce by hand making sure the hard center part stays out.  After a half hour of getting to know each other then comes the flavoring – a little red wine, a little brown sugar, maybe a small dash of fish sauce, a little salt.  Right at the end, I put in about a half cup of finely chopped basil and some fresh oregano.

I was contemplating yesterday just how different my Bolognese is now vs. before.  The main ingredient for both is still love.  That is a constant in everything I do.  I grew up in suburbia and we got all our food from Stop and Shop.  We had a large pantry filled with canned goods.  Now I have access to an organic food co-op and every Wednesday they have a farmers market (that is if I have not grown all the ingredients myself).  Even in early November, I am still able to get organic heirloom tomatoes, peppers, shallots, garlic, basil, oregano.  I often have a hundred pounds or so of ground beef in my freezer from my latest grass fed cow.  I no longer have to prepare dinner for 8 – usually it’s just me and one or two others or just me.  Which means I get to enjoy this meal several more times.  So it helps that the sauce just keeps getting better as it ages.  Some folks get the nuanced difference of what I do, some do not.  It doesn’t matter much to me as I do and I’m the one who is enjoying it.

It’s nice to have decades long mastery in some basics that I keep building on and developing.  Loving myself more is becoming just like my Bolognese – getting more layered with enhanced subtle nuances where I most notice the difference upon reflection.

Kate’s comment: when you made the bolognese in Haines, it made me dance. It was that good. That food was definitely love.

Michelle LaBrosse, CCPM, PMP, PMI-ACP, RYT

Twenty two years ago picture of my little pumpkins with the pumpkin harvest from our garden.

I get the wonderful good fortune to walk my little dog several times a day – sometimes these walks are more wonderful than others. Like when I am in a good clip getting close to the finish line on a pressing deadline and she just needs to go out. Living on a busy street with no yard, this means our standard walk around the block to take care of business.  And she has it timed to make sure we get 7/8th around the block before taking the required action.  As I was grumbling about this on our walk yesterday, it only took me about 1/2 way around to get into the proper mindset and enjoy the short respite away from the computer. And what pulled me into a more pleasant reverie?   A Pumpkin.

Pumpkins and me go way back.  Not sure when I started calling my small children pumpkin – but it was always a term of endearment around our home.  And then I have my famous pumpkin bagels that is one of my blog posts that gets the most views.  Those always provide a lovely charge to the home whenever I take the time to make them every other year or so.   And  now I share a car with my daughter  we call “pumpkin” as it looks just like a pumpkin.  Yesterday’s pumpkin influence that pulled me into a more loving  space was about making use of my halloween pumpkins.  You see I never got around to carving them and it seemed like I could put them to good use.  (Kind of reminded me on how my mother would have us color our easter eggs at the last minute so we could then eat them…..)

I sometimes feel like Forrest Gump and shrimp with respect to pumpkins – roasted pumpkin, pumpkin soup, pumpkin bread, pumpkin bagels, pumpkin custard, pumpkin curry, pumpkin seeds, pumpkin pie,  even pumpkin in my homemade dog food.   The rest of my walk was consumed with how I was going to prepare this delightful pumpkin soup for dinner after I used part of it for this week’s dog food.  (inspired by my friend Kerry, I now make my own dog food).   Loving myself more, has helped me love my dog more.  I used to feel it was too indulgent to make the dog  her own food but it dawned on me – I love making my dog her favorite food – so of course this is what I now do.

We got home from the walk, it took me less than five minutes to wrap up my work project and I got to start on all the lovely things I could do with my halloween pumpkins. I even get to enjoy the leftover pumpkin soup for lunch and my pup – she just devoured her breakfast that included, well pumpkin.

Kate’s comment: that explains why I was so motivated to make use of my pumpkins this year! I couldn’t stand the thought of wasting all that good food. It’s in my DNA to be obsessed with pumpkins.

Michelle LaBrosse, CCPM, PMP, PMI-ACP, RYT

I am especially happy where I find myself today – right here, right NOW.

Living a vital, vibrant life is what I mean when I say ” I have arrived.”  It’s the living life large and in charge – this is who I am and this is how I move through the world.  Choose to get on board the train of loving all that is just the way it is, or accept my smile and polite wave  as I speed on by as the good will blessing it’s meant to be.  I invite others on a similar journey to engage and align our love ourselves more trains for a time.  If we find something captivating where or  how each other is traversing this plane let’s  learn and expand in new ways – until either one of us feels done, for now.  Hmmm, it feels  like I’m writing a personal ad for an online dating service….

Getting to this place of shaking free of all that no longer served me has opened up a portal to significantly expanded creativity.  It’s also provided much needed energy and enthusiasm to move onward and upward with several new exciting initiatives with my two businesses – Cheetah Learning and Inspired Eagle. I feel more called to do my work the way I enjoy doing it with the people who I love working with day to day.  Do all leaders wonder at times if they suffer from delusions of grandeur when they embark on a grand vision?  For right now, being here, standing tall in the tallness of who I am sharing the gifts I have with the world in the way I best share them is more about showing up as who I really am.  It makes no sense to minimize myself to help others feel adequate. False humility does not help me better serve others.  Being a humble and faithful servant for others by leveraging  who I uniquely am for the betterment of all though is a different matter. I’m learning the difference in today’s pursuit of loving myself more.

Kate’s comment: I never knew if successful leaders had confidence built from their success or if their confidence was the reason behind their success… kind of a leadership chicken and the egg situation. What do you think?

Michelle’s Response – I find leadership to be both an innate personality trait and an acquired skill.  It is also situational based on confidence in a specific area – that grows and improves over time.  For example, I have great leadership skills in creating businesses – and many people trust me enough to follow me into new business ventures.  This is from having a proven track record of creating and running a successful venture that has stood the test of time.  At times though when visiting somewhere new, I do walk around with authority acting like I know where I’m going (when I don’t).  I joke that I learned that in the Air Force – to lead when I have no idea where I’m heading.   So to answer your question – I do think it’s an egg thing – leaders are born, but to become a great leader, now that takes some conscious effort.

When the fog clears, it really is all sunshine and rainbows….

Michelle LaBrosse, CCPM, PMP, PMI-ACP, RYT

I’ve said for years the secret to my success was doing the next logical thing.  Sometimes though when it’s really cloudy and foggy out where I can’t even see my hand when I put it out in front of me, it’s hard to see where that next logical step is.   Then all of a sudden the fog lifts and I see the path clearly laid out before me with everything I need to take my journey at my finger tips.  When this type of magic happens in my life, I move on it.  Today is such a day.

First, I’m now firmly grounded in loving myself more – it’s a my daily devotional practice.  So when I find myself anywhere other than in loving myself more – I shift fast.  This includes when in a fog – I just enjoy the cozy comforting all nestled in  that being in a fog allows.  Beating myself about being in the fog will not make the fog lift any faster.  And the winds of change do appear often enough I now know the fog yes will soon lift.  It reminds me of the book Siddartha – where his main skills are that he can fast, wait and think.  This is really all I need to do when living in a fog.

It’s now where I am with renewed clarity after being in a fog where I’m ready to prancercise on down the path before me.   Okay maybe not to the prancercise’s folks level of a gallop – but you get my idea.  I’ve learned through this 66 day challenge the decisions I make that are in my best and highest good, are also in the best and highest good for all – even if they choose to see things otherwise.  We are each on our own journey through life.  While I may cross paths with others and decide to take a different route based on what I learn from them – that is my choice.  How my path aligns with another is also a temporary thing – we each get to choose with whom we walk through life and for how long.  After all children grow up, parents pass away, friends relocate for work, significant relationships become less significant, jobs requirements change……  Learning how to love myself more has helped me navigate my way through the fog to find the clearly marked path of happiness in this loving myself more journey.   I’ve arrived.

Kate’s comment: What you said about life changing but loving ourselves staying the same – I love that this is a constant. People think that when life goes to shambles, all of it does – why can’t a few pillars remain as a stabilizer?

Michelle LaBrosse, CCPM, PMP, PMI-ACP, RYT

Increased confidence is showing up in some interesting ways with this challenge….

I have noticed recently I have more confidence in a number of different areas of my life of late. Could it be from learning how to love myself more?  It does show up in areas where I am following my heart.

As a business owner at times I’ve had to make the hard calls and make a move that created disruption for another’s life. This often comes with great consternation and much contemplation. Ultimately it does work out better for the other person in ways they could have never imagined – still it is me who pulls the trigger on the much needed change.

I strive to make these required changes with kindness and compassion even though I realize for the one experiencing the unwanted change it hardly ever feels this way. Being an empath my heart goes out to them – yet more often than not the other experiences as much if not more relief than I do from the change. And it got me wondering what other options do I have rather than going so far over the edge to accommodate another – sometimes to my own detriment?  When did I sign on as another’s be all end all of comfort and ease until death do us part?  How can I more confidently make changes that better suit the direction we need to head without the pull of the heart strings from the person or people we need to move away from to get there?  The answer to all these questions lies in learning how to love myself more.

Sometimes I beat myself up pretty hard when pushed to the edge where I must initiate a change in the business that impacts another in ways they do not like. Yesterday when talking about one such challenge with my sweetheart, I was called out on doing just that – beating myself up.  I think I referred to myself as a moron for even getting into the position I’m in.  Yet I had and have the confidence in my current course to take swift and proper action.  So how much of a moron can I really be?

Contrasted with the self flagellation of the business challenge is this new  pursuit to take on a complex craft project of the magnitude I have not attempted since college when my Mom was around to offer her sage guidance. Yet now I have more confidence to pursue it – and the learning curve is immense and intense. I’m not going to disclose the nature of this project as it is a Christmas surprise for someone who may read my blog from time to time.  As I’ve worked my way through the bumps and bumbles of reaquainting myself with the skills I have to do this project, my confidence is building.  And while I do not have Mom to lean on anymore, I do have google.  It’s amazing the you tube videos out there showing technique in exquisite detail.

Loving myself more gave me the confidence to follow my heart and pursue this complex Christmas project.  While pursuing this project is increasing my confidence, it is bleeding over to the business and I’m standing tall in my decision that it is the just and right action for right now.  It feels as if the weight of the world just lifted off my shoulders.  Interesting how many ways loving myself more is enhancing my existence.

Kate’s comment: Regarding the situation you’re talking about, and beating yourself up about it, and the empathy you were experiencing – you were experiencing empathy for everyone but yourself. Once you explained the situation to me, I couldn’t see it any other way – you were being empathetic to everyone else.